Anti-Bucket List

Anti-Bucket List

“Never will I ever”

Everyone knows what a bucket list is. I, personally, don’t have one. At least, not one written down. But, I thought it’d be fun to create an anti-bucket list.

Read on for some of the things I don’t want to do, ever in life.Β 

Go to a haunted house

I’ve already done Markoffs Forest in Maryland. I went twice. The first time I nearly pissed my pants before I entered the forest. The second time I hid behind someone the entire time LOL. Take me to a haunted house and I’m done 😱  I’m such a chicken. I can’t even watch horror movies without hiding behind a blanket. So, yeah, no….hard pass!Β 

Surfing

One time when I was at the beach in Ocean City, MD – I got stuck under a wave for what felt like minutes but was actually only a few seconds πŸ„πŸ½β€β™€οΈ πŸ™…πŸ½β€β™€οΈ I’ve been traumatized since. So, clearly, I can’t imagine surfing and getting caught under a wave.Β 

Give up coffee

This is something I’d absolutely never do. I mean, come on, the name of my blog centers around coffee. Me giving up coffee is a never, ever (unless my health depended on it, obvi) β˜• πŸ’›

Skydive/Bungee jumping

Imagine chicken shit me, hopping off a cliff secured by a rope – no freaking thanks. Jumping from a plane or off a cliff relying on a cord to drop me to safety – double no freaking thanks.

Swim with sharks

The closest I want to get to sharks is while watching Shark Week on the Discovery Channel. When I was younger, my parents took us snorkeling. I freaked out so badly that I refused to swim from the platform in the middle of the water until my mom came back to get me πŸŠπŸ½β€β™€οΈ She had to swim to the exit, get back through the line, swim to the middle platform, and guide me to the exit. I was terrified πŸ€·πŸ½β€β™€οΈ Granted, I’ve swum with the fish, turtles, and whatnot in Puerto Rico since, but don’t try to put me anywhere near sharks.Β 

Visit a cemetery at night

I have this thing about negative spirits following me home. I have two amazing kids, one of which may already be slightly possessed 🧟 So I will have to pass on visiting a cemetery at night. The last thing I want is some lonely, angry soul following me around! 

Hold a tarantula

Anyone that knows me should know I hate bugs. I’m trying to do better about not freaking out because I have kids and I have to be strong or whatever πŸ™„ The reality is, bugs (spiders, in particular) are just not my thing πŸ•·οΈ But a tarantula of all things?! Boy, bye.Β 

Do something that lands me in prison

I was never meant to be someone’s prison b*tch. Case closed 🀭

Go hunting

It’s not a knock against those who enjoy hunting, but it’s just not for me. I am too compassionate to actually kill an animal 🦌☠️ I’d probably sit there and cry after I killed it. Maybe have a burial service.Β Β 

Be seen on TV

The closest you will get to see me on TV is on my IGTV and even then, it still takes a lot for me to record and post πŸ™ˆ I don’t like being in the public eye to that extent. I definitely get camera shy unless, of course, I’m taking selfies πŸ“Έ πŸ˜— But the mere idea of getting in front of a camera for millions of people to watch scares the crap out of me. Never mind the fact that the camera adds 10 pounds or whatever so I’m definitely not even ready weight wise to be on TV πŸ™…πŸ½β€β™€οΈ

What are some things you never want to do? πŸ€”